
(Also, Ollie knows he is a whole snack, but would like to remind you that he is mostly fat and fur.)
By: JANA GREENE
They’re eating the dogs,
They’re eating the cats,
And like Ozzy Osborne,
Prolly the bats.
Would they, could they
Make a frappe
From a house cat
(Or is that Trump’s toupee?)
We Americans,
The tall and the small,
‘Spose to lock up our pets,
Cats and dogs and all?
“Pass the horseradish sauce,”
The immigrants say.
“I feel like a beagle sandwich today!”
Green eggs and ham?
Nah, dog on toast.
Or Cat brûlée,
Or a hedgehog roast?
Don’t leave out the exotics,
What about meats
Made out of lizards
And pet parakeets?
Could Trump, would Trump,
Make America great,
By spewing venom,
And dishing out hate?
Making it up as he goes along,
where in the heck did it all go wrong?
He would not, could not
Serve up on a plate
basic decency in the debate.
And what happens, then?
Well in ‘Murica we say,
Trump’s small heart shrunk
three sizes that day.
Perhaps the real meaning
Of a patriot’s truth,
is that Harris showed the class
Of a leader, times two.















